Life’s been a series of up and downs lately. I feel like there’s just never enough time to get things done. Milo has been having a huge sleep regression and it’s been hard on me. I love spending my days with him, but I’m also feeling super motivated by work and it’s just hard to find time for it all — and time to take care of myself. How do people do it? I’m currently looking for a little extra help a few hours a week, and I think that should make a big difference. I find myself on my phone too much when Milo is around, and trying to multitask, which is never very effective. I want to be more present — the time goes so fast.
It’s this constant push and pull, give and take of being in the moment and also crossing things off my to-do list and making plans for the future. I find myself savoring the moments that Milo wants to snuggle, or feeling sensitive when he only wants me. He’s choosing me still so much of the time, and I’m so grateful for his love. I don’t ever want to miss it because my mind is floating elsewhere.
Milo is such a sweet baby. It’s been such a joy to watch his personality unfold these past 10 months. He is a homebody in some ways – loves to play at home and snuggle, and I find that he really needs downtime, just like his mama. But he is super social and loves to make friends everywhere he goes. We take the bus most days, and he’s always smiling and tilting his head to strangers. He adores other kids, and starts jumping and screeching when he sees them. It’s so cute.
I can’t believe that he is turning a year old in just a few weeks. It’s such a surreal feeling. The first few weeks and even months of motherhood went by so slowly. It felt like this new normal was permanent, and just as quickly as I figured out a routine and how to manage it, the tide would change. Fast forward, quite literally, and it’s just a few weeks before we celebrate Milo’s first birthday.
In other news, I’m in total nesting / spring cleaning mode. We’ve lived in our house for 7 years, and it’s finally time to do some updating. I’m working on our back patio — trying to figure out some new furniture (why is outdoor furniture so expensive?!) and a few outdoor toys for Milo. It’s going to be so fun to have that outdoor space this summer. I’m also sprucing up indoors. My mom has been a huge help and has motivated me to paint. We started with Milo’s room and the living room last summer, and now we’re going to do the hallway and my bedroom.
I often find that when time feels like it’s moving too fast, nothing feels better than using your hands. Gardening, cleaning, polishing, organizing — you name it, they all feel like such stabilizing activities. Some weeks are just off, you know? And that’s okay. I’m learning to be okay with that.